Cuddling my semi automatic, what a very fuzzy feeling.

 "Have I gone mad?"

"I'm afraid so. You're entirely bonkers! But I'll tell you a secret...all the best people are."

Today has been utterly slow, tedious and downright dull. I woke up, at 10am after having missed Philosophy from insomnia having taken over last night, and dragged my bum into school for biology which was the most ridiculously long lesson, ever. However, I like biology lessons in a weird way - most of the time they're really dreary, but the rest of the time when I finally understand something I didn't last year, it's a really good feeling...almost like I've achieved something for once.

I'm ridiculously shattered - not the best feeling to have on the Monday when the rest of the week is going to be stupidly long. I say that as if one week is longer than the next, and it seems a bit silly really to say 'it's been a long week'. Ho hum.

I didn't see you today, and I was expecting to. I'm not sure if I was disappointed or pleased though...a bit of both I suppose.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow (technically today) - we're starting Abnormality in Psychology. The only part I'm not too pleased about is the anxiety bit...I'm pretty certain I'll probably have a panic attack just because I'll start thinking that I'm ridiculously abnormal because having panic disorder probably comes under the category of 'abnormal', in which schizophrenia, OCD, anorexia and narcolepsy also fall under...

I read somewhere that a rather large number of people who suffer from panic disorder commit suicide or suffer from agoraphobia...fantastic. I feel really safe in myself right now...(!)

I've gotta stop surrounding my thoughts with this, it's stupid. Seriously, I think there's only been like 2 minutes of today where I haven't been thinking about whether my heart is beating slightly faster, or if my eyesight is sharper...

On a happier note...Emily, ahhh.

How is it that after a year and nearly two months she still makes me a love-sick puppy again?I know, disgusting, and I make myself feel sick reading that back, but I love her, so much and I never thought I'd be this deep in a relationship ever in my life.

Sorry about the soppy stuff, but I wanted to end the blog on a happy vibe and the only thing I could think of was Emily. :)

Nuhnight. x